


You Did What Now?

by nealinor



Series: ABO Bingo Round 2 [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Egg Laying, Fluff, M/M, Oviposition
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-17
Updated: 2018-02-17
Packaged: 2019-03-19 16:51:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13708632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nealinor/pseuds/nealinor
Summary: Who knew that angels laid eggs to bred? Certainly not Dean. Otherwise known as adventures in egg laying.





	You Did What Now?

**Author's Note:**

> Square filled: Oviposition  
> So this was way out of my expertise but I took a stab at it. The end result is pure silliness and I'm not ashamed. No eggs were harmed in the writing of this fic. Enjoy the return of brain bleach. 
> 
> ~Neal

“So, let me get this straight. You and Cas had sex.” Sam began slowly, his hands on his hips as he spoke.

“Yup.” Dean saw no reason to deny this because the evidence of said sex was quite apparent.

“And afterwards, you laid an egg because that’s how angels reproduce.” Sam’s voice took on an edge of disbelief here because let’s face it, that part did sound pretty crazy.

“No! I didn’t lay an egg. The egg was produced using grace and energy from both of us or something like that. I’m not sure that sex was really necessary to have it.” Dean added as an afterthought, though he’s heartily glad that the sex part happened because it had been awesome.

“Why didn’t you just have a kid like you should?” Sam pointed out, his eyes on the egg, which was currently sitting in Dean’s lap.

Dean scratched his head and shrugged. “I dunno, Sam. That bit didn’t make sense to me. He has a knot and he stuck it in. You’d think I’d just get knocked up.” As an omega, he was equipped for that, after all.

“Ergh! I don’t need the finer details, Dean. Now I need brain bleach.” Sam winced, his expression one of disgust. “I don’t care about knots or anything else of that nature. What matters is that we have a werewolf hunt and you are refusing.”

“Well, what else am I supposed to do? Cas went off to get more stuff for our “nest” and left the kid with me.” Dean ran his hands over the egg in his lap. It was white shelled with blue speckles and it radiated warmth. It’s about 20 inches long and around 8 pounds in weight, in essence, the size of a newborn Were baby.

“It’s an egg, Dean. Wrap it in a blanket and put it on your bed. It’ll be perfectly safe.” Sam huffed, his hands once more on his hips.

“No can do, Sammy. Cas said I have to keep the egg warm. I have to stay with it and provide it body heat.” Dean petted the surface of the shell, wondering to himself what their kid would look like. If it’s part angel, would it have wings?

Sam snorted, clearly grinding his teeth in frustration. “This might be a werewolf pack. I’m gonna need backup.”

“Call Eileen.”

“She’s already busy with some witches in Vermont. It would take her days to get here. This hunt is half a day away. We could have it solved by tonight and would be back.”

“No way. If something happened to the egg because I left it, Cas would never forgive me.” Dean stubbornly insisted.

Sam paced across the room and back again. “Alright, then just bring it along. You can help me investigate and stay out of the fighting.”

Dean opened his mouth to refuse but then thought about it. If he went along with Sammy he could investigate and research then stay out of the action, which would be hard to do but not impossible. He could bring the egg along and they’d be back by tomorrow. Cas wouldn’t have to know. “Fine, but I’m playing it safe with the little guy.”

Sam sighed in relief. “Of course, Dean. We won’t harm your egglet. Get packed.”

***

Two hours and one visit to a generic superstore later, Dean and Sam were in the Impala and underway. In the passenger seat, Sam sat with the egg strapped into a baby carrier that he wore on his chest and was looking completely annoyed.

“Why do I have to hold it?” He groused.

“Because I have to keep my hands at 10 and 2.” Dean answered easily. “Also, it bumped into the steering wheel in my lap. Enjoy some bonding time with the kiddo, Uncle Sammy.”

“It’s an egg.” Sam grumbled, the scent of his discomfort wafting across the seat, allowing Dean to laugh at the alpha.

***

Things hadn’t gone according to plan. They never did. Sure, Dean wore the egg around while they were asking questions that afternoon. He’d gotten some odd looks but no one asked about the baby carrier the supposed FBI agent wore. He supposed it was because he was an omega and they did loopy things for their offspring. Unfortunately, night had fallen and Sam had gone out on his own to hunt the werewolf. And then he’d come running back with a pack of werewolves on his tail and had drawn Dean into the fray. Now Dean was hiding under the stairs of their hotel, his weapon at the ready and loaded with silver bullets with the egg strapped to his chest. More than once, he’d had to redirect himself to protect it and honestly, he was starting to get a little stressed out.

Next to him, Sam smelled equally under strain. “I think there’s just two left.” The alpha whispered.

Dean rolled his eyes. That was two too many. “Great. We need to draw them out so we can finish this. It’s too risky, Sam. The egg’s gonna get hurt and then what am I gonna do?”

“Dean! Our lives our on the line here!” Sam burst out in indignation before going on while shaking his head. “Fine. I’ll go draw them out. You be ready.” He loped off into the dark.

Dean stood, his fingers tight on his weapon, when all of a sudden, Cas materialized next to him.

“Dean!” Cas’s brows were knit and he was definitely scowling. “I can’t believe you took our child on a hunt!”

“This wasn’t supposed to happen. I was just here to assist with the interviews!” Dean exclaimed, his voice fierce and definitely defensive.

Cas shook his head. “I trusted you with our offspring. I believed that you would take it seriously.”

“I am taking it seriously! See!” Dean turned so Cas could see the places on his back that had gotten injured when Dean curled around the egg to protect it. “This was an accident Cas. I’ve been protecting the egg, I swear!”

Cas didn’t look like he was buying it. He reached out and lifted the egg from the baby sling. In the next breath, he was gone.

“Dammit!” Dean punched the wall behind him, then turned around just as Sam ran into sight with two werewolves chasing him. Dean took his frustration and used it to blow them both away. It was over in seconds.

“Thanks, Dean.” Sam came over with a tired sigh. “Let’s clean this up and go home. “ After a moment, he noticed Dean’s scowl. “What’s wrong? Where’s your egg?”

Dean crossed his arms over his chest and frowned at Sam. “Cas came and took it. He’s really mad at me, Sam.” His shoulders slumped forward in defeat. “He’ll probably never come back.”

Sam patted Dean’s back. “Cas loves you, dumbass. He’s probably just gone home. You’ll see.”

***

It took another several hours to clean up after the werewolves before they could ditch town. Dean refused to let Sam drive and promptly brooded the entire trip back to the bunker. When they arrived, he rushed down the stairs and to his room. Before he went in though, he stopped, suddenly nervous about what he’d find.

“Come in, Dean.” Cas’s voice sounded from behind the door.

Wincing, Dean opened the door and went into the room. He felt a little buoyed by the fact that Cas was indeed there; that he’d not taken the egg away. In fact, the angel was sitting on the bed, which was piled high with blankets that indeed fashioned a nest. In it was the egg. It was perfectly fine.

“Hey, Cas.”

Cas stood up and brushed the wrinkles out of his coat. “I’m glad you made it safely back.” He reached out and touched two fingers to Dean’s forehead, healing all of his wounds.

“Look, Man, I’m sorry about what happened. It was my intention to stay clear of the fighting… just ask Sam.”

“I believe you, Dean. I’m calmer now and know you would never harm our child.” Cas said, watching Dean with that stare of his. “It doesn’t change the fact that something dangerous did happen. We both must make changes to our lives for this to work. I don’t expect it will be easy. We both live dangerous lives.”

“Yeah.” Dean agreed as he glanced at Cas. “I will promise to take it easy with the hunts if you promise to stick around a little more.”

Cas tilted his head as he thought about it, then broke into a smile. “Agreed. Now then, come join me on the bed. I have a catalogue from Babies R Us and we need to make some decisions.”

Dean sighed, thankful the crisis had passed and joined Cas with his baby catalogue. He might have groused about baby shopping but secretly, he loved every minute of it.


End file.
